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Archive | Arts & Entertainment

Snow and winter jokes

What do snowmen call their kids?

Chill-dren.

What did the icy road say to the car?

“Want to go for a spin?”

What falls in the winter but never gets hurt?

Snow.

What does a gingerbread man put on his bed?

A cookie sheet!

Why did the girl keep her trumpet out in the snow?

She liked playing cool jazz.

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Icy.

Icy who?

Icy you!

How do mountains stay warm?

They put on their snowcaps.

What do you call it when a snowman throws a temper tantrum?

A meltdown.

What is a snowman’s favorite snack?

Ice krispies treats.

What does December have that no other month does?

The letter D.

Where do snowmen put their money?

Snowbanks.

What’s the difference between a Christmas alphabet and the regular alphabet?

The Christmas alphabet has Noel.

What is the best breakfast cereal to eat in the winter?

Frosted Flakes!

Where do snowmen love to dance?

At a snow ball.

What’s a snowman’s favorite drink?

Iced tea.

What did Jack Frost say to Frosty the Snowman?

“Have an ice day!”

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.

What can you catch with your eyes closed?

A cold.

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Scold.

Scold who?

‘Scold outside!

Why are winter days great?

They’re snow much fun!

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Hometown Happenings 1-13-22

theTable Meals at The Springs Church

Jan. 13,20,27: Meals are served every Thursday fom 5:30 to 6:30 pm at The Springs Church on the corner of Oak and Grant. All are welcome to theTable to enjoy this free meal that is being shared with us! #tfn

Mobile Food Pantry

Jan. 17: The Mobile Food Pantry will be in Cedar Springs on Monday, January 17th. Free food and everyone is welcomed! Drive thru registration begins at 4:30 pm. At 5:00 pm, cars will drive up by the tables and food boxes will be loaded in their vehicles. The location has changed to The Cedar Springs Fire Station, 38 N. Second St., Cedar Springs. #2

Blood Drive in Cedar Springs

Jan. 18: The Cedar Springs Public Library will be hosting a blood drive in their Community Room next Tuesday, January 18th with appointments available from 12:30-7pm. To sign up for an appointment, please call 1-866-642-5663 or visit versiti.org/MI. Be the difference in your community and help save 3 lives in little as one hour! #2

God’s Kitchen in Cedar Springs

Jan. 18,25: Join us for dinner every Tuesday. God’s Kitchen – Cedar Springs welcomes families from Northern Kent County and the surrounding area to a Tuesday Evening Meal. No charge – no registration required!  Served from 5:30 – 6:30 pm at the St. John Paul II Parish, 3110 – 17 Mile Rd., Cedar Springs. For more information, call the Church office at 616-696-3904. #51-20

Sand Lake Museum Open

Jan. 25: The Sand Lake Salisbuy Park Museum will be open Tuesday, January 25th from noon to 7 pm. The museum is open the fourth Tuesday of every month. #2

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The Post travels to Hawaii

The Grand Rapids Sweet Adelines Barbershop Chorus had the honor to represent Michigan at the 80th Anniversary Pearl Harbor Commemoration in Oahu, Hawaii from December 4-9, 2021.  The chorus sang and presented a wreath at the USS Arizona Memorial.  They toured the USS Battleship Missouri, took part in a flag folding ceremony and sang for a group of WWII veterans at the USS Missouri.  Members of the chorus pictured here are (l-r): Chris Segard, Mary Myers, and Sue Harrison. 

“We were so humbled and excited to represent Michigan at this historic event,” said Sue.

Thank you to the Sweet Adelines for taking us with you!

Are you going on vacation? Be sure to take along a printed edition of the Post and get someone to snap a photo of you or your family with it. Send it to us along with some info about your trip (where you went, who went along, what you saw) and send the photo and info to news@cedarspringspost.com. We will print as space allows. If you forget the Post, please do not photoshop it into the photo. Just take it with you next time!

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New dog cross breeds

Collie + Lhasa Apso = Collapso, a dog that folds up for easy transport.

Pointer + Setter = Pointsetter, the traditional Christmas pet.

Pekingese + Lhasa Apso = Peekasso, an abstract dog.

Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel = Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as mountain air.

Terrier + Bulldog = Terribull, not a good dog.

Bloodhound + Labrador = Blabador, a dog that barks incessantly.

Malamute + Pointer = Moot Point owned by…oh well, it doesn’t matter anyway.

Collie + Malamute = Commute, a dog that travels to work.

Deerhound + Terrier: Derriere, a dog that’s true to the end.

Bull Terrier + Shitzu = You figure this one out.

Posted in Joke of the WeekComments (0)

Hometown Happenings 1-6-2022

Hometown Happenings articles are a community service for non-profit agencies only. Due to popular demand for placement in this section, we can no longer run all articles. Deadline for articles is Monday at 5 p.m. This is not guaranteed space. Articles will run as space allows. Guaranteed placement is $10, certain restrictions may apply. You now can email your Hometown Happenings to happenings@cedarspringspost.com please include name anad phone number for any questions we may have.

Let It Snow at KDL

Jan.3-Mar. 31: We are pleased to present Let It Snow for adults and teens. Our winter reading program returns with a collectible mug for completers. Read a minimum of six books between January 3 and March 31 to receive the 2022 Let It Snow ceramic mug. Participants who finish an additional four titles are entered into a drawing to win an iPad, an experience or other prizes. Participate online at kdl.org/snow or pick up a printed form at any KDL branch. #1

Family Storytime at KDL

Jan. 4-Feb. 23: For young children ages 0-5. Read and sing together as a family. Enjoy stories, music, movement and rhymes that develop early literacy skills. Tuesdays from January 4 – February 22, at 10:30am, Nelson Township/Sand Lake KDL Branch, 88 Eighth St. Wednesdays January 5 – February 23 at 10 am, Spencer Township KDL Branch, 14960 Meddler Ave. #1

theTable Meals at The Springs Church

Jan. 6,13,20,27: Meals are served every Thursday fom 5:30 to 6:30 pm at The Springs Church on the corner of Oak and Grant. All are welcome to theTable to enjoy this free meal that is being shared with us! #tfn

BUNCO is Back!

Jan. 7:   BUNCO is back at the Rockford Masonic Lodge, 1430 Northland Drive NE (across from Bell Furniture) on the first Friday of the month, January 7th. Doors open and light refreshments at 6 pm, and play begins at 6:30. $5.00 donation to play. You may bring your own snack if you wish or one to share. Join us for lots of fun, fellowship, prizes and a 50/50 raffle each night. Sponsored by Rockford Order of the Eastern Star – Bring a friend, everyone welcome! Questions? Call: Janet 616-784-5372. Proceeds will go either to a local food pantry or Paws with a Cause. #1

God’s Kitchen in Cedar Springs

Jan. 11,18,25: Join us for dinner every Tuesday. God’s Kitchen – Cedar Springs welcomes families from Northern Kent County and the surrounding area to a Tuesday Evening Meal. No charge – no registration required!  Served from 5:30 – 6:30 pm at the St. John Paul II Parish, 3110 – 17 Mile Rd., Cedar Springs. For more information, call the Church office at 616-696-3904. #51-20

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New Year’s jokes

Q: Why do you need a jeweler on New Year’s Eve?

A: To ring in the New Year.

My New Year’s resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year’s resolutions.

Q: What did the little champagne bottle call his father?

A: Pop!

Q: What’s a cow’s favorite holiday?

A: Moo Year’s Eve.

Q: Where can you find comedians on New Year’s Eve?

A: Waiting for the punch line.

Q: What do farmers give their wives at midnight on New Year’s Eve?

A: Hogs and kisses.

Q: Where can you go to practice math on New Year’s Eve?

A: Times Square.

Q: Why should you put your new calendar in the freezer?

A: To start off the New Year in a cool way.

Q: What do you tell someone you didn’t see on New Year’s Eve?

A: I haven’t seen you for a year.

Q: What happened to the man who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve?

A: He got 12 months!

Posted in Joke of the WeekComments (0)

Hometown Happenings 12-30-21

Hometown Happenings articles are a community service for non-profit agencies only. Due to popular demand for placement in this section, we can no longer run all articles. Deadline for articles is Monday at 5 p.m. This is not guaranteed space. Articles will run as space allows. Guaranteed placement is $10, certain restrictions may apply. You now can email your Hometown Happenings to happenings@cedarspringspost.com please include name anad phone number for any questions we may have.

theTable Meals at The Springs Church

Dec. 30: theTable will not be having dinner the week of December 30th. We will be back every week in the new year! See you all January 6th. Be safe and stay healthy!! #tfnb

God’s Kitchen in Cedar Springs

Jan. 4,11,18,25: Join us for dinner every Tuesday. God’s Kitchen – Cedar Springs welcomes families from Northern Kent County and the surrounding area to a Tuesday Evening Meal. No charge – no registration required!  Served from 5:30 – 6:30 pm at the St. John Paul II Parish, 3110 – 17 Mile Rd., Cedar Springs. For more information, call the Church office at 616-696-3904. #51-20

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More Santa jokes

What do you get if Santa comes down the chimney while the fire is still burning?

Crisp Kringle!

Why does St. Nicholas have a white beard?

So he can hide at the North Pole!

What do you call Santa when he has no money?

Saint “Nickel”-less!

What smells most in a chimney?

Santa’s nose!

What does Kris Kringle like to get when he goes to the donut shop?

A jolly roll!

What do you call someone who doesn’t believe in Father Christmas?

A rebel without a Claus!

What is invisible but smells like milk and cookies?

Kris Kringle burps!

What did Santa get when he crossed a woodpecker with kleenex?

Rapping paper!

What does Santa like to have for breakfast?

Mistle-”toast”!

Why does Santa take presents to children around the world?

Because the presents won’t take themselves!

What does Santa use when he goes fishing?

His north pole!

Posted in Joke of the WeekComments Off on More Santa jokes

Hometown Happenings 12-23-21

Hometown Happenings articles are a community service for non-profit agencies only. Due to popular demand for placement in this section, we can no longer run all articles. Deadline for articles is Monday at 5 p.m. This is not guaranteed space. Articles will run as space allows. Guaranteed placement is $10, certain restrictions may apply. You now can email your Hometown Happenings to happenings@cedarspringspost.com please include name anad phone number for any questions we may have.

theTable Meals at The Springs Church

Dec. 23,30: Meals are served every Thursday fom 5:30 to 6:30 pm at The Springs Church on the corner of Oak and Grant. All are welcome to theTable to enjoy this free meal that is being shared with us! #tfnb

An Outdoor Christmas Experience

Dec. 23: Come and experience Christmas Outdoors at Frost Creek! There will be a live nativity with a petting zoo of camels, sheep, goats and donkeys, games and activities for the kids, hot chocolate, a tree lighting, and bonfire barrels for warmth. The evening begins Thursday, December 23rd at 6:30 pm with the tree lighting at 7 pm. Frost Creek Church is located at 15671 Algoma Ave., Cedar Springs (just north of 19 Mile Rd.) #49-51

Winter Break Day Camp at HCNC

Dec. 28-30: Howard Christensen Nature Center is hosting a Winter Day Camp December 28 – 30 from 10 am to 2 pm. Cost is $10 per day. Bring your lunch and dress for the outdoors! 16190 Red Pine Drive, Kent City, 616-675-3158, www.howardchistensen.org. #50,51

God’s Kitchen in Cedar Springs

Dec. 28: Join us for dinner every Tuesday. God’s Kitchen – Cedar Springs welcomes families from Northern Kent County and the surrounding area to a Tuesday Evening Meal. No charge – no registration required!  Served from 5:30 – 6:30 pm at the St. John Paul II Parish, 3110 – 17 Mile Rd., Cedar Springs. For more information, call the Church office at 616-696-3904. #51-20

Posted in Hometown HappeningsComments Off on Hometown Happenings 12-23-21

REO Speedwagon and Styx with Loverboy

At Van Andel Arena May 31

Grand Rapids – It’s been four years since legendary rockers REO Speedwagon and Styx joined forces for a summer co-headlining tour. While the world has changed since then, fans’ desire to rock out hasn’t. Styx and REO Speedwagon are telling you to close those laptops and get out of your sweatpants, because they’re set to once again bring their rock & roll classics to the masses, this time with special guest Loverboy for the “Live & UnZoomed” tour that kicks off May 31, 2022 in Grand Rapids, MI at Van Andel Arena.

Check out this video to learn more about the REO Speedwagon/Styx/Loverboy “Live & UnZoomed” tour at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VX3AwzTy7V8.

Tickets went on sale Friday, December 10. 

“I can’t think of a better way of touring the USA next year than with good friends we’ve known for years and performed with on many a stage,” said Styx’s Tommy Shaw. “What a great night of music this will be!”

REO Speedwagon’s Kevin Cronin said, “Tommy (Shaw) and I have done a number of Zoom performances together during the pandemic, and REO and Styx are ready to go get UnZoomed, and out on the road for our fifth U.S. tour together. Add our great friends Mike Reno and the Loverboy guys, and I am totally psyched. If I wasn’t performing in it, I would totally come out to see this show. See you all, LIVE and UNZOOMED!”

Loverboy’s Mike Reno proclaimed, “We can’t wait to take the stage and rock this summer, it’s gonna be awesome. These are all the groups I grew up with, and I’m there too. Best tour of the summer…guaranteed.”

Buy tickets on Ticketmaster or go to https://www.vanandelarena.com/p/buy-tickets.

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Ray Winnie
Intandem Credit Union

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