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Categorized | Roger on Main St.

Main Street

Watchful eyes

You may have noticed the little blue “police” cars on the streets of Rockford. Behind the wheels are some unpaid good guys, members of Rockford’s Volunteer Services Unit Chief David Jones came up with the useful (and cheap) idea six or seven years ago. The volunteers (about 16 of them) police handicapped parking spaces, check on vacant homes and on the disabled, and monitor the White Pine Trail. They also staff the Visitors Center much of the week.

Volunteers usually work one day a week. Although unarmed themselves, they keep an eye on things throughout the city and are in radio contact with headquarters if they see something that needs attention.

Sgt. Dave Robinson, who has been with the Rockford Police Department since 2000, is in charge of the unit. In 2011 Dave received the West Michigan Crime Prevention Practitioner of the Year Award.

Our sister city, Cedar Springs, does not have an official Neighborhood Watch. However, Chief of Police Roger Parent says the department encourages residents to notify the police 24/7 if they see anything that might be suspicious. Chief Parent emphasizes that the C.S. police are never too busy to handle these calls.

More watchful eyes

The radar installed in a police helicopter caught a speeding motorist.

Down below, a police officer pulled him over and began to issue a traffic ticket.

“How did you know I was speeding?” asked the frustrated driver.

The officer pointed somberly toward the sky.

“You mean,” said the motorist, “that even He is out to get me?”

Police department

From a State Policeman:

I once received a call from a woman who asked how to baste a turkey. After a stunned moment I, being the go-to cook in my family, described the procedure.

Then I thought to ask: “But why would you call the State Police to find out how to baste a turkey?”

There was only a slight hesitation before the lady replied, “Well, you knew, didn’t you?”

Paramedics department

As he came out his front door onto the porch, a man passed out in a dead faint. Someone called 911.

When the paramedics arrived, they helped him regain consciousness and then asked if he knew what caused him to faint.

“It was enough to make anybody faint,” said the man. “My son asked me for the keys to the garage and, instead of taking off in the car, he came out with the lawn mower!”

Art department

Tom goes to his first show at an art gallery and is looking at the paintings. One huge canvas has black with yellow blobs of paint splattered all over it. The next painting is a murky gray color with drips of purple paint streaked across it.

Tom walks over to the artist and says, “I don’t understand your paintings.”

“I paint what I feel inside me,” explains the artist.

Tom says, “Have you ever tried Alka-Seltzer?”

 

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