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Dogs must wear hunter orange

New guidelines issued by the state last week specified that while dogs can now legally carry a firearm during their own special hunting season, they must wear hunter orange—just like their human counterparts.

“What’s the use in that?” asked one angry dog owner. “Dogs aren’t going to see the orange anyway. Don’t they only see in black and white?”

The state authorized dogs to hunt small game last fall, after several packs of canines picketed the state capitol, carrying signs that said, “Dogs have the right to bear arms” and “Dogs are people, too.” The one that convinced authorities, however, said “Friends don’t let friends hunt duck (without a license).”

“We just thought it was time to give dogs a chance,” said one state senator, who asked not be named. “We all know they like to go hunting with their owners, and now they have their own special season. Besides, by the time you add up the money we can make on them buying a hunting license, a barking permit, a firearm permit, and us getting a cut of the hunter orange sales, the state could be raking in some serious puppy chow.”

A group of cats lobbied against giving dogs the right to hunt. “Anyone who chases his own tail is a serious threat to society,” said a spokesman for the felines. “Give them a gun and soon it will be open season on cats. Nine lives go pretty fast.”

If you have a dog that wants to take advantage of this special hunting season, get him ready now because the new hunting season for dogs starts April 1—April Fools Day!

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